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Stay Busy…

August 31, 2016

It’s my new secret weapon, staying as busy as possible to avoid any distractions. 

Grief can’t come creeping in my door if it’s not open. 

Or at least that’s what I keep telling myself.  

  • I am practicing yoga on a daily basis. In love.  Focus, concentration and  relaxation. I simply cannot lift weights now that Anthony died.  We did that together.  Yoga is mine. He was strong as an oxen, but flexibility wasn’t his forte. 
  • I work with new colleagues, taking on new challenges. Workdays fly by.
  • Social media is my friend. I am sorry to all of you who are friends with me, I know I post the hell out of Facebook.  I love all of you for supporting me. 
  • Not one but 2 bereavement groups.  If you’ve lost someone, I can’t recommend groups enough. To have not hundreds, but thousands of people ready to talk with me is comforting. Online groups mean I can post my grief when it hits. I don’t have to wait to be on the bus like I do now.  So yes my friends, there is more to my story. I will share it as I learn how to process it all. 
  • Lectoring in local church twice a month.  Healing my spirit. Love my fellow parishioners.  They’re so kind, giving me feedback on my readings and greeting me with big hellos or hugs.  I always wanted to do this before Anthony died. No time like the present. 
  • Spending time with my boys and family.  Lou sent Luciano and I on a spur-of-the-moment trip to California.  Saw Mom, Jen, Matt and my Girlies.  One word “amazing.”
  • Reading – at end of the first book in the “Outlander” series by Diana Gabaldon.  Already bought books 2 and 3. Big fan of the show on Starz. 
  • Setting up events – no not formal parties, it’s too soon.  Simple shopping events for friends. Something they can enjoy and I can feel like I am participating in the grander universe. It’s almost the holiday shopping season. After Labor Day, it’s All Systems Go!! Time to start burning holes in our credit cards!  
  • And I almost forgot, writing this blog. It’s second nature. I almost don’t consider it an activity.  It is a very deep part of who I am. Now. 

Tomorrow is September 1.  If you have read my blog since its inception, you know that I turn 50 in September.  50 and Fabulous looked VERY different a year ago. 

More to come tomorrow.  I am still considering all the aspects of my all-important September transition into the next decade.  

A decade which one of my 3 sons will never see.

Shit, I was so good up until now.  I need a tissue. 

Being busy doesn’t mean no tears.  On the contrary, it simply gives me a door to close to keep them out temporarily.  

However, the door swings both ways and notice there is no lock. You can push or pull it at any time.  

Sometimes the door even revolves.  

That’s why staying busy is so important.  If you get stuck in a revolving door, it’s quite a ride.  Sorta like Will Ferrell in Elf, but without the fun part.  

I still yell my head off. 

Until tomorrow. 

đź’‹~Miranda 

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