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Breathing in the Insanity – Approaching 50 and Fabulous

Breathing in the Insanity

June 22, 2016

I am laughing my ass off right now.  Yes, laughing for a change!!I went to Sephora today as I have been missing my Urban Decay Revolution lipstick in Naked2 for over a month now.  That’s my shade and my signature.  I needed MY lipstick. 

Long lasting, moisturizing, does not bleed, doesn’t crease or settle into my lip lines, Urban Decay makes my perfect lipstick.  Omg how many times have you seen someone smile only to see their lip color has creased into the lines of their upper and lower lip?  I am sorry, but that’s just shitty lipstick formulation. 

And anyone who KNOWS me, knows I must have over 100 bullets stashed away, lipsticks I have tried and put into the “Oh Well…Bucket” if I cannot return them. Chanel, Charlotte Tilbury, Estée Lauder, Lancome, NARS, MAC, Giorgio Armani, Shiseido’s, Guerlain, Dior, Bobbi Brown… I have tried them ALL.  Some I like very much, but they were not my perfect match. 

If I have to smooth you out with a lip brush an hour after I put you on, or pound on gloss because you’re drying my lips up like a kitchen sponge…you’re outta here. 

Notice I only mention department store/Sephora brands here.  I do not do drugstore brands, ever.  I fully admit I am a true snob in the makeup and skincare department.  And thanks to my Mom, my extensive research, and thousands of dollars spent over the years, I know brands, textures, colors, and ingredients.  So if you want a makeup shopping buddy, call me… I will even apply it for you.  This Momma knows her shit.  

My lipstick sold out everywhere as Urban Decay has been coming out with a new formulation called VICE – over 100 options. Creamy, matte and sheers. 

What??? New?!!  What was wrong with my old one?!  

Oh Urban Decay why, why, why???  I need normalcy!!!!  SERIOUSLY!!!

I have enough stress in my life.  That song “Breathe” by Anna Nalick has been on extended replay. 

So I popped into my local Sephora at lunch today (VIB Rouge card carrying member) and there it was…

The new Urban Decay Vice Lipstick display case.   

Wow, laid out nicely. All the colors of lipstick located directly next to their coordinating 24/7 Lip liners.  Takes the guess work out of that purchase!  

I proceed to look for my shade – Naked 2 – I mean it’s gotta be there, right??!  

They have Liar, Sinister, Naked, Criminal, no Naked 2…


I ask the Sales Associate for some help.  Maybe it was in the back in the stockroom (fingers crossed). 

“No that shade is no longer available…”

Did I hear that right?  

“I can help you find a new one… There are some awesome new shades….”

I felt my heart stopping and my breathing became labored.  When you have a Holy Grail Lipstick, or any product for that matter, you DON’T DO NEW!!  

She saw my look of sheer horror and remained unphased.  My Sales Associate proceeded to clarify the coverage type I prefer, creamy, we moved onto color swatches. 

What is close to Naked 2?

The first lipstick she swabbed on the back of my hand the texture felt right.  It was the creamy Urban Decay texture I remember. 

Breathing a little better now…

“…this color looks really nice on your skin, let’s try it on your lips. Follow me over to the salon station.”

Sephora has that big counter with lots of lighting, barstools, and plenty of applicators to give you a full face make over if you need one.

She cleaned off the lipstick and the liner and allowed me to apply myself.  Very important…

Not bad… Not bad… going on nicely

I am sorry but I absolutely hate the way most makeup artists (except for you of course Mom) apply my lipstick.  They all seem to make my lips look uneven or thin.  I end up spending more time correcting their chop-job than I do swiping my credit card to pay!! Yeesh!!

I swiped the lipstick on and thought, wow, this color is nice!  My Sales Associate turned to me and said “oh that looks great, gives you a nice glow.”  

Yes it does… Me likey…

Beige, slight caramel tint, creamy, nice texture…  Makes my makeup look “complete” without being unnatural. 

So what’s the name of this shade??

You won’t believe it….


I bought them on the spot.  

Considering all of the constant insanity my life has been through in 2016, it seems only fitting that my new signature lipstick (hopefully, we still have to battle test it) has that same moniker.  

Insanity, welcome to my life.. And my lips…

If this version of insanity ends up staying for the long term, I can definitely handle it. Make me love you Insanity!


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