Sometimes I just shake my head in disbelief. I say to myself, how did my life get here? My sons are adults in age, 24 and 20, but many days they’re bigger children than their 16 year old brother.
I thought I raised them and more often than not they demonstrate they’re just not ready for adulthood.
My oldest Anthony called me at work to “chat”:
“Hey Ma, what are you doing?”
Working (same thing I have done from 7am-4pm for 25 years), why what’s up?
I am sitting in the middle of Manhattan and my sons and their father are all in Queens…
I don’t know where your Father is Anthony I am at work, why?
“I need a ride home from train.”
Um, you can’t go get a Metrocard and take the bus?
“Mom, really? I gotta go.”
- WHO CALLED WHO HERE??
Their father obviously is out and/or dealing with another of my sons life issues.
My middle one is some days just unapproachable. And if I did approach, I would give him a good…yes I am going to go there.
But I definitely wish I did sometimes. He is such a sassy mouth!! Ring ring goes my cell phone…
Hey there Joe, what’s up?
“Dad is being really unreasonable and I just can’t take it.”
Ugh, here we go, another “Dad said no to something moment.” I don’t entertain those moments at the office.
Well Joseph I am at work and since I cannot be there to discuss with both of you directly I think you should sort this out with your father.
“Mom you just don’t listen, and I need you to listen for 2 minutes.”
Ok but you have 30 seconds. I have a meeting.
“God Mom, there shouldn’t be a time limit on this. Know what forget it, you’re just like Dad. You never listen, are a pain in my ass, and this is why I never call you at work.”
- Click…. Call over. Big Little brat hung up on me.
Please Lord give me strength. Why did it become a crime to use the wooden spoon? It was good enough for my mother!
When my sister and I misbehaved Mom always appeared in our room, wooden spoon in hand. Plus she has these really piercing green eyes. All she had to do was stare at you in a very Joan Crawford-esque, Mommie Dearest sort of way, with the spoon in hand, and we would be in tears.
I remember one day my sister and I went into the kitchen, broke Mom’s wooden spoons and threw them away. She went out and bought stainless steel ones. Mom didn’t play games.
So many days I wish Mom didn’t live in California so I could say “look at them” and she could stare and scare them into submission just like she did me!
I gotta get her on FaceTime more often!!
Like I said in the beginning, this behavioral disease is currently limited to my 2 oldest. It seemed to manifest at 18 and symptoms get worse as they get older. My 16 year old has two more years before he contracts this disease, albeit I already see the signs. This is an exerpt of recent discussion…
Louie you’re trying my patience. Keep it up and you will have a personal audience with our Lord and Savior. Wanna meet him?
“Fine, forget it then.”
- Exit, stage right
I love my sons more than life itself on MOST days. However today they’re their father’s children.
And don’t think HE is any better. Some days that man is worse than a 6 year old.
“No one is listening to me. You need to talk to them.”
I am not listening either, talk to YOUR sons yourself.
“God Miranda, I just wanted you to listen.”
You’re trying my patience. Keep it up and you will have a personal audience with our Lord and Savior. Wanna meet him?
“You can be such a pain in the ass.”
- Click… He hung up too. Big Bigger Brat.
And to think I WONDER WHERE MY SONS PICKED UP THIS DISEASE FROM??
… shaking my head…